role: assistant

text:
Yes. If you do it now, I’d do it like a scalpel, not a grenade: 1–2 questions, explicit “for my understanding/closure,” and give her an out (answer later / not by text).

Two drafts (pick one):

**Option 1 (recommended, no affair reference):**
“Lisa — I want to understand something for my own closure, not to argue. In therapy you often said you didn’t want to hurt me, and in your Feb 24 note you described avoiding hard conversations. Do you think part of why the ‘high alert / tracking moods’ dynamic and the ‘not wanting romantic partnership’ truth didn’t come up in couples therapy was that you didn’t want to hurt me? Or was it that you weren’t clear on it yet? You can answer whenever, and if text isn’t the right medium we can do a short call.”

**Option 2 (more concrete, splits into two questions):**
“Lisa — for closure, can I ask two direct questions? (1) When did you first suspect/know you didn’t want a romantic partnership with me? (2) Why didn’t the ‘high alert / tracking moods’ dynamic get named in couples therapy while we were still trying? If text isn’t ideal, I’m open to a short call.”

Tell me which option (or what to change), and if you say “send exactly this,” I’ll send it verbatim.


role: user

text: that's not the only question i want the answer to.


text:
Totally. Paste the full list of questions you want answered (messy bullets are fine), and tell me one thing: do you want to **mention the affair explicitly**, or keep it implicit as “a pattern of not wanting to hurt someone”?

Then I’ll:
- rewrite them into clean, answerable questions (no rhetoric)
- cut to a “send now” set (3–5 max) + an “ask later” set
- draft a single text you can approve verbatim before sending